“Try it again, breathing’s just a rhythm. Say it in your mind until you know that the words are right: This is why we fight.” – Regina Spektor
Day 109 (109!) is about breaking out of the rut Beattie calls “vic-tim-i-za-tion.” She didn’t write it like that; I did. (or maybe she did, and her publisher was like, “That’s annoying. Change it immediately.”) It’s a shout out to the peeps who still don’t get that they don’t have to be downtrodden souls anymore.
I’m kinda, maybe, sorta, a little, I guess, turning a corner on this. Somewhere in these 109 (109!!!!!) days, I’ve just decided I want to be more positive – which I think is helping with the whole “WAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!” side of me. I think this, actually, is the first step to believing that you’re deserving of the life you want. So while I still have incredibly low days, and while I still wish that some people wouldn’t be so negative and/or get their head out of their asses, and/or I just want people to just love me bunches!!!, I think that to some extent, we all shape our own existences, if just for a little bit – if just for a minuscule moment each day.
I’m trying to be positive with mine. And if what comes of that is that I no longer feel the need to downplay myself to somewhat benefit others instead, that would be supertastic.(Wow. Sorry. That last sentence is really, really effing wordy.)