Leave a Comment Humor, life

If I Could Not Fail…

Maybe it’s because my couch has a permanent imprint of my ass these days, but I’ve been thinking a lot about that saying, “What would you do if you knew you could not fail?” You know the one. It’s usually in block lettering or – in some versions – accompanied by some awe-inspiring picture of a mountain or a winding road or Jesus.

But I… I’m tripped up on it. If I knew I couldn’t fail, I’d do anything. You might think, “You need money to do anything, Amanda!” and I’d agree with you, but also, if you couldn’t fail, you could start a lemonade stand and turn it into the next coming of Apple. Money doesn’t listen to failure.

If I couldn’t fail, I think I’d be a huge asshole. If you always win all the time, how much fun would you be? It’d be like, “Hey, let’s play Monopoly!” but it’d be the shortest game ever because you’d monopolize within twenty minutes! And you might say, “But then, wait, Amanda, who would want to play with you?” and I’d agree with you, but you also don’t fail at making friends either. Catch-22, I know.

If I couldn’t fail, my sense of reality would be way skewed. I’d be climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro tomorrow and would be married to Ryan Gosling by the weekend. You know what love and instant attraction don’t understand? Failure.

I would lose 30 lbs and gain it all back and lose it all again just because I could. Some may call this yo-yo dieting, but I say NOT SO. I say THIS IS A WORLD IN WHICH YOU CANNOT FAIL.

So, knowing all that, I’d rather fail. Because failure is what makes success so amazing. If I knew I couldn’t fail, I’d just as sure not do anything. Where would the challenge be?

I’d rather take my chances. And maybe some day, somewhere, in a Tumblr far, far away – someone will make a block-lettered picture of that.

Have a good night, everyone.

1,730 Responses to “If I Could Not Fail…”

  1. Anya

    I love this post! If I couldn’t fail, I’m be doing my first Ironman this year! :-) And my kids would be perfect angels. :-)

  2. amanda

    Ironman is an awesome goal! Although I think the perfect-angel kids might be boring after a while. :)

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